German is offensive to her...and Jesus...

Me (reading a song title): Jesus bleibet meine freude.

Tess: Don't say that to Jesus!

.

Her protective nature for Jesus should come as no surprise if you read the conversation Jaime posted yesterday on Facebook:

This conversation with Tess was too crazy not to share. Disclaimer: She gets pretty creative with her theology (borderline blasphemous perhaps) and I can't take credit for any of her doctrinal innovations.

Tess: "Do you want to play Lord?"

Me: "Uh...what?"

Tess: "I am the Lord. Jesus is the Lord too. He is my son! And his mother is Mary. She is the Lord too! I am just a little Lord, for kids. We all live waaay up high in the clouds! Except Mary, she lives way even more up higher in the clouds than me."

Me: *speechless*

Tess: "Me and my son Jesus, we...we go to school together."

Me: "Oh really?"

Tess: "Yes. We do. I want everybody to be kind. That's why I comed on Earth to help people. But sometimes I still like to do naughty things."

Me: "Oh no...what naughty things do you like to do?"

Tess: "Oh...just...on Saturdays. On Saturdays I like to naughty things. And Tuesdays."